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Microsoft move stuns nation

© April 2009 Anthony Lawrence

Microsoft's exciting announcement that Windows 7 will be able to downgrade to XP has sent a shock wave through the computer industry as both competitors and application providers absorbed the news.

Reaction from Steve Jobs was immediate: "Not only will our upcoming Snow Leopard release be able to downgrade to Leopard, but you'll be able to downgrade Leopard to Tiger and follow that all the way back to Jaguar and even Puma and Cheetah! Further, starting next month, all Apple iMacs will be able to downgrade themselves to Apple II's".

IBM's Sam Palmisano said that he was studying the announcement closely but saw no reason why their Linux products couldn't match Windows features by being able to roll back to earlier kernel versions. "We can take you to OS/360 if that's where you want to go", he explained.

The ever flamboyant Larry Ellison of Oracle was not to be outdone. "We're skipping all the intermediate B.S.", he explained. "As of tomorrow, you can downgrade Oracle to DBase II in one step."

This reporter was surprised to learn that it's not just the computer industry that sees Microsoft's move as smart business. Ford Motor Company's Alan Mulally said that Ford was planning similar capabilities long before Microsoft made this announcement. "We had convertibles back in the twenties", he sniffed, "so this is nothing new. With our latest technology, you can downgrade to a gas-guzzling 70's muscle car at the flip of a switch."

However, not everyone is on-board with downgrades. Barack Obama, speaking to reporters who asked about the U.S. Government being run more like a business, had this to say: "While I certainly want to revert many Bush era actions, we're not going to take this too far. No Constitutional rollbacks and Hawaii remains a State as long as I'm in office!"

Analysts do insist that this trend won't be stopped. "It's simple nostalgia", explained one prominent psychologist who did not wish to be identified. "People long for a simpler time - Microsoft has its fingers on the pulse of the people, that's for sure."

But some caustic critics insist that Microsoft can't be trusted. An anonymous trader on Wall Street says he never believes anything Microsoft says: "Sure, they let you downgrade to XP. But then every Tuesday another so-called 'patch' comes out and in a few months you'll be right back to Windows 7. That's how they get you."

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More Articles by © Anthony Lawrence

Wed Apr 8 12:44:46 2009: 6053   TonyLawrence

This just in from SCO:

"We really, really, REALLY want a do-over!"

Wed Apr 8 13:18:48 2009: 6056   BrettLegree

I was hoping Microsoft would let me downgrade to DOS 3.3 - now that was something special!

Wed Apr 8 13:43:35 2009: 6057   TonyLawrence

They'd like to, but SCO has some patents there and Microsoft definitely does not want to go head to head with them!

Wed Apr 8 15:08:30 2009: 6059   MikeHostetler


I've been saying for a long time that one of MS's biggest mistakes with Vista was not just that Vista is a stinking pile of crap, but that XP was "good enough" for most uses. Most people know their way around, they know XP's quirks, they know their apps work on it. And then Vista comes around -- "Why is it asking me permission all the time? Why doesn't my wireless work? It worked in XP!" and so on and so on.

Don't get me wrong -- XP sucks, but at least I have to work to crash it and it's quirks don't always annoy the living crap out of me. But Vista? <shudder>

Wed Apr 8 15:57:42 2009: 6060   anonymous

I've been told a reporter followed up with a question about Alaska, home of former VP candidate Sarah Palin. Obama responded:

"Drop Alaska? That's negotiable."

Wed Apr 8 15:57:43 2009: 6061   BigDumbDInosaur

Ford Motor Company's Alan Mulally said that Ford was planning similar capabilities long before Microsoft made this announcement. "We had convertibles back in the twenties", he sniffed, "so this is nothing new. With our latest technology, you can downgrade to a gas-guzzling 70's muscle car at the flip of a switch."

Why 1970s muscle cars? The 1960s versions were just as fuel-thirsty but put you into the seat much harder. Oh for the days of my 1966 Chevelle with its 360 HP 396. Now, there was a gas-guzzling tire-smoker!

As for being able to roll back Vista to XP, that's kind of like swapping a flush toilet for an outhouse. Neither is worth a crap.

Wed Apr 8 16:00:18 2009: 6062   TonyLawrence

Hey, Steggy:

That avatar isn't a dinosaur.. :-)

Wed Apr 8 23:00:08 2009: 6066   MartinMalden

Tony, hi,

Absolutely brilliant - I was crying with laughter!!



Thu Apr 9 13:47:09 2009: 6069   BigDumbDinosaur

Hey, Steggy:

That avatar isn't a dinosaur.. :-)

You just noticing that now? <Grin> I don't have any pics of any ancient reptiles. Also, around here I'm HMIC (Head Monkey In Charge). So the gorilla pic is probably appropriate.

Thu Apr 9 13:51:50 2009: 6070   TonyLawrence



I see a few that look just like you :-)

Thu Apr 9 14:26:54 2009: 6073   BigDumbDinosaur

Let's see how this one looks.

Thu Apr 9 14:31:12 2009: 6074   BigDumbDInosaur

Hmm...nothing changed...

Thu Apr 9 14:32:33 2009: 6075   TonyLawrence

It may take a bit to be public..

Thu Apr 9 15:02:43 2009: 6079   BigDumbDinosaur

Lessee if anything changed this time...

Thu Apr 9 15:06:32 2009: 6081   TonyLawrence

Once it actually changes, all old comments will update.. they all use the same link:



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