Uncharitable

That's the problem with helping out friends, neighbors and relatives. You can get sucked in to a vortex that you'll never get out of, and soon find yourself spending way too much time helping people who aren't going to pay you. No, that's not really it, is it? They'd pay you if you asked, but there is just no way you are going to take money from them. That's the real problem.

That was from Freebies, a recent article that talked about doing free work.

I think most of the people who read that understood that I'm not a nasty, self centered s.o.b. who thinks only of himself. However, I did get one piece of chastising email that asked "Don't other people help you?"

Well, sure. But..

If your neighbor happens to be an auto mechanic, you don't pester him with your car questions unless he is also your mechanic, or if you already have a close relationship where you help each other out with anything. You might also beg a favor in an emergency: if your car won't start and you urgently need to get somewhere, it might not be a terrible breach of manners to ask for help even if you don't know your neighbor very well.

It's also fine when someone offers help. I was walking down to the post office last week and noticed someone struggling to carry some siding up a ladder. I offered a helping hand. Strangers have done the same for me. That's just being human, right?

And of course there are always the friends and relatives who you can always count on. Need to move a piano? You know who to call. You count on them, they count on you. It works.

That's why I said "there is just no way you are going to take money from them". If somebody needs an important piece of email and can't get it, or if they saw me trying to start my car and offered jumpers, of course I want to return the favor.

I'd just rather return some other favor.

First of all, most people's problems are going to be with Windows machines. I don't like Windows. It's like asking a Saab mechanic to work on your Yugo. He probably knows what to do, but he isn't going to like it. I just don't like Windows. If they had Linux or Macs I'd be much more happy to help. When I'm asked to help with Windows, I'm being pressed into something I really dislike doing.

There's another part to this that may not be obvious to some folks. I earn my living doing computer support, but I don't work 9 to 5. I work "whenever", and while part of that is "whenever I choose" another part is "whenever I'm needed". In other words, I may be spending Sunday afternoon working, so an interruption for a neighbor's Windows problem can be keeping me from earning a living.

Finally, there really is just too much. Windows machines have too many damn problems. Nobody is going to need a piano moved every week, but it seems like there's almost always something wrong with anybody's Windows computer. Maybe it's nothing major, but there's always something: it's slow, I can't get this to work, how do you install that, and so on. There's just too much.

So I'm not unfriendly, I'm not uncharitable, not cold hearted. I feel their pain, and I will help when asked.

I'd just rather move the piano.

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Tue Jun 13 22:09:24 2006: Subject:   drag


Oh hell ya.

People have this impression that working on computers isn't work. That because you like computers that you'd absolutely LOVE to fix their problems. So they don't hesitate to call you whenever there is a small problem. It's like some people just go stupid.. It's something that normally they would be able to figure out after working on it for a while, but because they know your phone number all of a sudden they are helpless.

There is a Dilbert Cartoon that sums it up nicely. I couldn't find a link to it anywere so I can only post the dialog..

Dilbert is on a computer and a fellow walks up behind him and goes:

Generic Guy: "Hey, Dilbert, would you mind stopping by my house after work and seeing if you can fix my computer?"

Dilbert: "Sure. And while I do that you can be at my house cleaning out the grout in my shower."

Generic Guy (with a shocked expression): "That's crazy talk."

Dilbert: "Hey. I'm not the one who majored in comparative literature"



Tue Jun 13 22:12:20 2006: Subject:   TonyLawrence


Love it :-)



Tue Jun 13 22:21:19 2006: Subject:   drag


Also (forgot to mention) it's just plain stressfull.

Your dealing with a device with a unknown history. They will probably have all sorts of crap on there and have probably done some very odd things to the machine that they don't remember and you don't know anything about. They could have family photos on there, or their business's entire financial record.. And it would probably be their only copy.

When Windows starts to go haywire just breathing on it can cause it to spontaniously corrupt the entire harddrive with no warning. You go and install new drivers for the sound card, reboot, and BLAMO! the system locks up and 50% of the harddrive is corrupt.

Then people don't keep backups. They don't have any rescue disks, they don't have any install media. If you try out a 'OEM COMPAQ' label cdrom you have a good chance that it will wipe the harddrive out and reinstall Windows from scratch if you try to boot up with it.

So then if the computer (semi)works before you touch and now it's not booting up it's your fault. Your the one that busted it and now they are pissed at you for loosing all their baby photos. At least in their eyes.

And now you have this pissed off guy for a neighbor, plus you took responsibility by agreeing to work on their computer and you can't leave them in the lurch.

So you can start off clicking around another person's PC to figure why they are getting nothing but porn pop-ups.. and end up with not just one, but several evenings of work ahead of you and a now-angry OR miserable oh-I-need-to-get-my-email-from-my-boss buddy.



Wed Jun 14 14:41:51 2006: Subject:   BigDumbDinosaur


Dilbert: "Hey. I'm not the one who majored in comparative literature."

I remember that one. It sums up my attitude about giving free computer help, especially when anything Microsoft is involved.

My wife thinks I'm a gruff, old curmudgeon for not being willing to help out various family members (mostly on her side of the family, BTW) with their ailing PCs. I have to periodically remind her that she's a teacher, but doesn't hold free classes for all of the children of her friends and acquaintances. I'm willing to help move the piano (metaphorically speaking) but am not willing to give away free computer support to Windows users.



Thu Jun 15 14:08:30 2006: Subject:   rbailin


Here's the Dilbert link:

http://pag.csail.mit.edu/~adonovan/dilbert/show.php?day=01&month=02&year=2006

--Bob



Thu Jun 15 15:53:58 2006: Subject:   TonyLawrence


Thanks, Bob!



Sat Jun 17 15:34:09 2006: Subject:   BigDumbDinosaur


Here's the Dilbert link...

I printed the Dilbert strip on my large format printer (it took a little cleaning up in an image editor to blow up well) and hung it on the wall in my shop next to the signs that says: "To err is human, but to really screw up things you need a computer."

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